This blog often focuses on substance abuse. Scott has spoken numerous times about the increase in opioid overdoses since the COVID-19 pandemic began. He also addresses the issue in his book, The Opioid Epidemic.
However, it’s important to note that addiction isn’t the only crisis facing our community. On his April 7th podcast, crisis coach Scott Silverman had the opportunity to speak with journalist Ilyssa Panitz about another problem on the rise, courtesy of the pandemic: divorce.
Business Insider cites financial, emotional, and physical stresses as the most common reasons for relationships breaking down during the past year. One attorney in Nashville, TN mentioned a couple that filed for divorce because they couldn’t decide who would give up their career to stay home with the children.
The pandemic is a force that couples never imagined they’d have to face. Some relationships will survive, but many won’t. Ilyssa reminds us that divorce is “all about mindset and attitude.”
Just as a person in recovery can come out the other side better than ever, so can those who experience divorce. Ilyssa refers to it as dissolving a partnership and suggests the real reason we are so averted to the idea is that divorce comes with uncertainty and instability. We like our routines!
Another problem surrounding divorce is something Scott mentions quite often in his interviews: stigma. People are scared to talk about divorce, and they’re scared of the reaction they’ll receive. Pity and disapproval are some of the more common responses. Friends may feel as if they have to choose sides.
Ilyssa suggests that we all need to change the way we view divorce.
It’s not “tearing a family apart;” it’s changing the family dynamics. It’s not “depriving children of both parents;” it’s providing children with more stability and unity.
As a family navigator, Scott uses his knowledge and personal experience to help guide people through recovery. Ilyssa could also call herself a family navigator, since she pulls from her own experiences and the knowledge of experts she interviews. However, she prefers the term “divorce journalist.”
She fills a niche, providing support and knowledge through her columns and a twice-weekly Clubhouse room. As she navigated her own divorce, her goal was to build a community of people who truly understood everything the process entailed. When getting divorced, you have to do more than call a lawyer. You have to sort out the accounts, the mortgage, the children, and more.
Just like recovery, the divorce process is a journey. There will be tears along the way. You will never be the same. But once you get past the shock of the change, you might find that you are a better, more confident version of yourself.
Be sure to check out Ilyssa’s column, “5 Things You Need to Know How to Survive and Thrive During & After A Divorce” on Medium.
If you are facing a situation with a loved one, spouse, or even a child that has started to spiral, please call Scott H. Silverman at 619-993-2738.
If he can’t personally help with your unique situation, he will put you in touch with someone who can! Scott is the CEO of Confidential Recovery, an outpatient addiction treatment program in San Diego.
(c) 2021 Scott H Silverman. All Rights Reserved.
